I started writing about trusting God months ago but never quite got round to finishing. Now I know it was because I was yet to experience something that would add weight to this article that was missing at the time I started writing it. I hadn’t yet found myself asking God if He really truly loved me. Thinking I never want to be a mother if my children are ever going to feel the way I was feeling at that moment. Finding myself crying at a time when I thought I would be rejoicing. That’s when I knew what trust really is. It’s not believing God will do something at any given moment. It’s laying on the floor crying and choosing to believe. It’s feeling like your heart is in pieces on the floor and knowing you have no choice but to believe. It’s things not going anywhere near what you hoped for and still knowing God’s will, will be done in your life.Trust I believe really comes out through faith in the fire, not when everything’s going well and you say “Oh I trust God.”
I’m sharing even as I’m still in it because if you’re in the fire right now, I want you to know that’s how trust is built. It doesn’t mean God doesn’t love you or that He’s abandoned you. Far from it. It means you’re being prepared for the role you’ll play for the body of Christ. It means the devil is fighting hard to derail you. You should smile because he wouldn’t fight so hard if he didn’t know God was going to use you in the most amazing way for the Kingdom. Dig your heels in and stand in faith. Believe that the one who promised to be with you always will never leave you. Even when it looks like He has. Stand your ground and refuse to be moved from your spot by the enemy. When you feel like you can’t take anymore, cry out to God, He is always waiting to hear from you. Even if it doesn’t look like it, He hears you and at the right time, will answer you in ways you never could have dreamed.
“So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.” Hebrews 10:35-36.
I still don’t know if what I’m hoping for (that had me crying out to God) will happen the way I want it to but He is on the throne and everything will work out the way it is supposed to. Just because something is not happening the way you had hoped, does not mean it is not happening the way it was supposed to. He knows it all and He is good, not just good but good for YOU, trust Him. Even with tears streaming down your face, trust Him. Even when it looks impossible, trust Him. He knows what He has planned for you.
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.” Jeremiah 29:11-12.
In Joel 2:28 God promised the coming of the Holy Spirit on all people. This came to pass in Acts 2. What God promised hundreds of years before happened. He is the same God, why would He act any different now? If He fulfilled promises He made hundreds of years before, why would it be difficult for Him to fulfill promises He made to you a month ago, last year, 5 or even 10 years ago. He will do it! He will do it! Did I mention He will do it?!
“The Lord is trustworthy in all he promises
and faithful in all he does.” Psalm 145:13b
God is true to His word and will fulfill His promises. Wait on Him. No matter how long or frustrating or painful it seems, wait on God. Even when you believe you can do it on your own. What God has for you does not even compare to what you can do for yourself. Why would you trust yourself over God? He is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. If He says He will do something, He will do it.
“God is not human, that he should lie,
not a human being, that he should change his mind.
Does he speak and then not act?
Does he promise and not fulfill?” Numbers 23:19.
Through my experience of learning how trust is built in the fire, I’ve met some awesome people who in a matter of days became family. I don’t think I’ve ever received this much support from a group of people I just met, not even in person yet. That alone is worth this whole journey so far. Through them I’ve felt the Father’s love. When I was discouraged they lifted me up. When I needed it the most He sent two of them to prophesy over me, leaving me feeling not only loved but that God sees me. So if you’re waiting on God for something, consider what else you could be learning or open your eyes to what He’s brought into your life through the process of waiting.
Let me leave you with this reminder:
“Trust in the Lord, and do good;
dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness.
Delight yourself in the Lord,
and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Commit your way to the Lord;
trust in him, and he will act.” Psalm 37:3-5.