If you’re someone who wants to live your life in a manner that is pleasing to God, you’ll want to do only that which pleases Him. One thing that pleases God where singles are involved is honoring our bodies. Among other things, that involves waiting to have sex before marriage.
Corinthians 6 verses 18-20 say: “Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.”
I know the idea of waiting to have sex before marriage sounds outdated and archaic but it’s in the Bible and if we want to live according to it then that’s one thing we have to choose to follow. Even if it wasn’t in the Bible it would be good for you anyway and God knew that. The only one who gets hurt after having sex with someone and then you go through a breakup, is you. God wants to save you from that kind of hurt.
Sexual purity is one aspect that is forgotten by many people these days, including many churches. It’s become so normal that it’s only when someone says they’re not having sex before marriage that people are shocked.
Maybe some of you have fallen prey to this kind of thinking, that sex before marriage is ok. You’re not alone. So did I. Don’t despair though because salvation means you become born again. That means you are a new creation in Christ Jesus. You might not be a virgin but your previous sins are forgiven and you can start afresh. The great thing about God is that He forgets your past and works with you and in you as the daughter who just came home.
I believe the best thing you can do as a single person is to choose celibacy before marriage. I don’t mean mere abstinence. I don’t mean doing it because of lack of options or just not being in a relationship at the time. Because if that’s the case then once you’re in a relationship you’ll let the other person lead and before long you’ll be having sex. It has to be a choice and decision you make beforehand. A decision you make that you will wait for marriage before having sex.
For example you can be celibate for 2 years but not have had sex for 3 years. The other year the only reason you weren’t having sex could be because you were not in a relationship.
It might not be an easy decision to make but once you’ve made it, prayed about it and allowed the Holy Spirit to lead that aspect of your life, it will get effortless. It should be every aspect of your life but I get that it may be daunting but at some point it will have to be everything. Granted there might be temptations along the way but you can get through them because God will always give you a way out.
You have to let that flesh part of you not rule your life. Remember, the Holy Spirit and flesh are two opposite sides. They don’t see eye to eye.
Galatians 5 verses 16-17 say: “So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the flesh. They are in conflict with each other, so that you are not to do whatever you want.”
The book The wait by Devon Franklin and Meagan Good explains waiting quite well and convincingly for those who are still deciding if they should wait. I read it when I was already waiting but it made me see some truths I hadn’t considered. It made me feel like I’m not alone in this. More than anything it showed me a modern day example of what waiting on God looks like. It also gave me hope that men who are waiting, men who choose celibacy before marriage, actually exist.
As far as I’m concerned “celibacy is cool.” Spread the word. Hashtag it if you must.
Let me leave you with a video where Devon Franklin and Meagan Good discuss waiting in conjunction with their book “The wait.” It will give you a look into a practical example of waiting.